No beauty discussions today, guys. I have some disheartening news to share: Life is hard.

I really wish I didn’t have to be the one to break that news to you. I really wish it wasn’t true. But if I’ve learned anything in the last 30 years, I’ve learned that life is hard. Sometimes, it’s really hard.

Various seasons and transitions in your life, even people, will utterly suck. There’s no cave to hide in, no river to cross and no mountain to climb to avoid the occasional — but certain — suck you will experience at one time or another. 

With that terrible news I offer this: Life becomes exponentially harder when you attempt to avoid the suck. (Stop looking for that cave. You’re embarrassing yourself.)

Even knowing this, I’m still guilty of trying to avoid the suck. I do it all the time.

I put off writing that paper for school. I convince myself that working out when it’s raining is silly. I watch Netflix when I should be studying. I only apply lotion to the skin that’s visible because ain’t nobody got time for much more. I’ll probably delete that last example later. Sometimes the laziness is real.

I’m learning to embrace the suck.

• A Master’s degree requires writing papers the suck.
• A toned body requires exercise the suck.
• A successful blog requires blogging consistently the suck.
• Healthy relationships require occasionally picking up the phone the suck.
• A life without back fat requires avoiding Taco Bell the suck.
• Earning a paycheck requires showing up to work instead of going to the beach the suck.

Are you picking up on a theme here? It really doesn’t matter what road you’re on, dear. There’s no getting around the suck. You either go through it, or you stand still. You cannot skip past winter to enjoy spring sooner. I tried it a few times (theoretically speaking). It only made winter (the suck) last longer.

Life is beautiful, but it’s hard. Change is hard, and it usually sucks for a little (or long) while. I’ve set so many goals and failed to see them through to completion because I bailed at the first sign of the suck. No more.

You are strong enough, smart enough, and have everything you need to withstand the suck. The suck is a necessary but temporary discomfort on the road to any place worthwhile. The suck is not your enemy. Those negative, self-limiting beliefs and the spirit of laziness, are. Embrace the suck.

What does your suck look like?

Until next time. I’m rooting for you.

Candace Alike Smith is a Las Vegas-based content creator, womb warrior, and matcha enthusiast. Candace founded this site in 2015 to help women of color reclaim their vitality. Follow Candace’s content on holistic beauty, mental wellness, herbs and essential oils, non-toxic products, healthy libations, wellness travel, and self-reflection. Green is her happy color.

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